给儿子的信(A Letter to My Son)(2)

　　you will fail many times but if you allow that to stop you from trying, you will miss out on the amazing feeling of success once you reach new heights with your accomplishments. failure is a stepping stone to success.

　　life isn't a competition

　　you will meet many people who will try to outdo you, in school, in college, at work. they'll try to have nicer cars, bigger houses, nicer clothes, cooler gadgets. to them, life is a competition — they have to do better than their peers to be happy.

　　here's a secret: life isn't a competition. it's a journey. if you spend that journey always trying to impress others, to outdo others, you’re wasting your journey. instead, learn to enjoy the journey. make it a journey of happiness, of constant learning, of continual improvement, of love.

　　don't worry about having a nicer car or house or anything material, or even a better-paying job. none of that matters a whit, and none of it will make you happier. you'll acquire these things and then only want more. instead, learn to be satisfied with having enough — and then use the time you would have wasted trying to earn money to buy those things … use that time doing things you love.

　　find your passion, and pursue it doggedly. don't settle for a job that pays the bills. life is too short to waste on a job you hate.

　　love should be your rule

　　if there's a single word you should live your life by, it should be this: love. it might sound corny, i know … but trust me, there's no better rule in life.

　　some would live by the rule of success. their lives will be stressful, unhappy and shallow.

　　others would live by the rule of selfishness — putting their needs above those of others. they will live lonely lives, and will also be unhappy.

　　still others will live by the rule of righteousness — trying to show the right path, and admonishing anyone who doesn't live by that path. they are concerned with others, but in a negative way, and in the end will only have their own righteousness to live with, and that's a horrible companion.

　　live your life by the rule of love. love your spouse, your children, your parents, your friends, with all of your heart. give to them what they need, and show them not cruelty nor disapproval nor coldness nor disappointment, but only love. open your soul to them.

　　love not only your loved ones, but your neighbors … your coworkers … strangers … your brothers and sisters in humanity. offer anyone you meet a smile, a kind word, a kind gesture, a helping hand.

　　love not only neighbors and strangers … but your enemy. the person who is cruelest to you, who has been unkind to you … love him. he is a tortured soul, and most in need of your love.

　　and most of all, love yourself. while others may criticize you, learn not to be so hard on yourself, to think that you’re ugly or dumb or unworthy of love … but to think instead that you are a wonderful human being, worthy of happiness and love … and learn to love yourself for who you are.